After the tone, leave your name, number, and tell where you left the money. I'll get back to you as soon as it's safe for you to come out of hiding.
Concatenation of events preclude our coming to the phone. Please speak freely, with magniloquence upon occasion of the tone.
Greetings, you have reached the Sixth Sense Detective Agency. We know who you are and what you want, so at the sound of the tone, please hang up.
Hello, and welcome to Answering Machines of the Rich and Famous! Sam can't come to the phone right now because he's spending the week in his beautiful summer home on the French Riviera.
Hello, this is Ron's toaster. Ron's new answering machine is in the shop for repairs, so please leave your message when the toast is done... (Cachunk!)
BEEP Hello, this is WVKE, you're on the air.
Hello, you've reached 555-1552, the Apartment at the End of the Universe. Please leave your message, name and number at the sound of the tone. Keep your hands, feet, extremities, and obscenities inside the car at all times. Enjoy your ride.
Hello, you've reached Jim and Sonya. We can't pick up the phone right now, because we're doing something we really enjoy. Sonya likes doing it up and down, and I like doing it left to right... real slowly. So leave a message, and when we're done brushing our teeth we'll get back to you.
Hello. I'm not at home right now because I'm out making changes in my life so leave a message and if I don't call you back, you're probably one of those changes. (BEEP)
Hi, this is Ed. I'm secretly replacing Jane and Bob with dark sparkling Folger's Crystals. Leave your name, number, and a brief message and they'll call you back when they're nice and percolated. See if you can tell the difference.
Hi, this is Jim. Thanks for calling during my pledge drive. A basic membership is only $30, and a $60 pledge gets you an "I love Jim Shea" T-shirt. Please wait for the tone, and thank you for your pledge.
Hi, you have reached Jerry McGuire. Show me the message! Show me the message!
Hi. Do you ever feel, like, your head is full of sand, not your regular loose sand mind you, but compacted sand, and there were like, I dunno, bugs or something jumping up and down on the compacted sand? Well, sometimes I do. Bye.
Hi. Now you say something.
I can't come to the phone right now because I'm down in the basement printing up a fresh new batch of 20 dollar bills. If you need any money, or if you just want to check out my handiwork, please leave your name, number, and how much cash you need after the tone. If you're from the Department of the Treasury, please ignore this message.
I know you're out there. I know that you're afraid. You're afraid of us. You're afraid of change. I don’t know the future. I didn't come here to tell you how this is going to end, I came here to tell you how it’s going to begin. I'm going to hang up this phone, and then I'm going to show these people what you don’t want them to see. I'm going to show them a world, without you. A world without rules and controls. Without borders or boundaries. A world where anything is possible. Where we go from there, is a choice I leave to you.
Thank you for calling Soviet Embassy. No KG... Er, no diplomats are able to answer phone, so at sound of capitalist tone, leave name, telephone number, and short description of secrets you wish to sell.
These words are lovely dark and deep, but I've got promises to keep and miles to go before I sleep, so leave a message at the beep.
This is not an answering machine -- this is a telepathic thought-recording device. After the tone, think about your name, your reason for calling, and a number where I can reach you, and I'll think about returning your call.
Vancouver Coast Guard, may I help you. (Caller thinks they dialed long distance.)
We're not in cause we're out LOOTING! Leave a message and we'll call you back and tell you what we got.
We're sorry. You have reached an imaginary number. Please rotate your phone 90 degrees and try again.
(Theme from "Raiders of the Lost Ark" in the background:) You've reached the residence of Jill and Tom. We can't come to the phone right now, because we're cleaning the refrigerator. Please leave your name and number, and we'll get back to you.
Sunday, November 7, 2010
Friday, November 5, 2010
Guides for manly style, skill, shaving and image.
A Man’s Guide to the Trench Coat
How to Smell Like a Barbershop
A Man’s Guide to Sweaters
How to Buy and Restore Vintage Shaving Gear
A Man’s Guide to Style Transition: 6 Steps to Start Dressing Like the Man You Know Yourself to Be
How to Build Your Wardrobe: Part III-Men’s Hats, Watches, and Other Accessories
More great reading at Art of Manliness.
100 Must Read Books: The Man's Essential Library
How to Shave Like Your Grandpa
100 Must See Movies: The Essential Men's Movie Library
How to Tie a Tie
9 Ways to Start a Fire Without Matches
Bringing Back the Hat
Stop Hanging Out With Women and Start Dating Them
10 Worst Products For Men Ever Created
Do More Than One Stinking Pull-up
Rediscovering the Barbershop
Find your best Shaving Gear for the perfect shave everytime.
I like these three and the Art of Manliness. If you have a good experience and rapport with others, please comment.
Amazing Shaving
Shave Blog
Lees Razors
Monday, November 1, 2010
Find your voice with professional training and coaching programs.
In my search for the best schools and programs for voice training, I found this excellent team of coaches and production experts. If you want to raise your performances to their very best, maybe this is for you.
Industry Leading Voice Over Training
Introductory Classes, Demo Development and Production, and Voice Evaluation from the industry experts at Voice Coaches.
All Voice Over Training programs are one-on-one, all-inclusive, and presented by our exceptional team of industry professionals. With experts in broadcasting, voice acting, film, communications, speech language pathology, audio production, and marketing, our Training and Production Team delivers tremendous individualized industry preparation coupled with personalized, long-term support to provide confidence, fun, and continued industry success.
See feature videos of voice over talent at the voice coaches blog:
VoiceCoaches.com Blog
Sunday, October 31, 2010
Thursday, October 28, 2010
Performance
Yet another brilliant animated short by Grickle, Graham A.
Very fitting for Halloween. Enjoy.
Very fitting for Halloween. Enjoy.
Tuesday, October 26, 2010
I can see myself doing shows like this in my own costumed character creation.
Here is another talented person that I draw inspiration from.
I can see myself doing shows like this in my own costumed character creation. Read on, enjoy, and check this guy out. You'll dig him.
All content © 2004 Jason Ringenberg / Courageous Chicken Music
FARMER JASON
BECAUSE THERE IS A LITTLE FARMER IN ALL OF US
When internationally acclaimed singer-songwriter Jason Ringenberg created his family music character FARMER JASON in 2003, he had no idea he was launching what would prove to be the most commercially successful creation of his storied career. With JASON AND THE SCORCHERS, he pioneered the fusion of punk rock and country that turned the music world on its ear in the mid-1980s. Their first record, LOST AND FOUND, still shows up on critics’ “best of the 1980s” lists, and there is an exhibit of them in the COUNTRY MUSIC HALL OF FAME. When Jason went solo in 1999, the LONDON TIMES called him “one of the most dynamic live performers of his generation.” In 2008 the AMERICANA MUSIC ASSOCIATION awarded the band their LIFETIME ACHIEVEMENT AWARD. Jason could rest easily, assured that his place in rock ‘n’ roll history was secure.
However, with two sweet, beautiful, preschool daughters missing Daddy Jason during his 200 dates a year touring schedule, Jason wanted to make a cd that his kids could listen to while he was out globetrotting. Since they lived on a small farm near Bon Aqua, Tennessee, and Jason grew up on an Illinois hog farm, he reckoned that a roots oriented record about farming and farm animals was just the ticket. Hence the first Farmer Jason cd, A DAY AT THE FARM WITH FARMER JASON, was born. He released it “purely for fun” in the fall of 2003, delighted to hear his daughters singing along. That was the peak of his ambition for it.
To his surprise, soon lots of other daughters and little sons were singing along as well. Disney’s magazine FAMILY FUN called it “one of the Top 5 Family CDs of 2003.” Farmer Jason, Jason Ringenberg’s “twin brother” (wink wink), was soon doing concerts from inner city schools in Brooklyn to country fairs in rural Norway. In 2006 he released ROCKIN’ IN THE FOREST WITH FARMER JASON. With its stick in your head hooks and subtle lessons about ecology and nature appreciation, the record earned rave reviews, including the PARENTS CHOICE GOLD AWARD. Its success generated even heavier touring around the world, including many major European and US festivals. At the huge STAGECOACH festival USA TODAY called the Farmer Jason show “one of the most memorable of the festival.”
In Tennessee, Nashville Public Television took notice of this new sensation in their back yard, and produced an educational interstitial video series starring Farmer Jason based on songs from the two cds called IT’S A FARMER JASON! To everyone’s delight and surprise, the program won an EMMY AWARD for BEST CHILDREN’S PROGRAM MID SOUTH REGION in 2009. Using those videos and more new footage, Farmer Jason released the IT’S A…FARMER JASON! DVD in May of 2009. One reviewer for DADNABBIT called it “…instantly memorable fun… everything you would want in entertainment for your young ones.”
What started out as a simple side project to entertain his own daughters has grown into a worldwide band wagon pulled by a tractor and a singing farmer. You can bet the tractor will keep on rolling. Climb aboard and grab a pitchfork…or a guitar…
I can see myself doing shows like this in my own costumed character creation. Read on, enjoy, and check this guy out. You'll dig him.
All content © 2004 Jason Ringenberg / Courageous Chicken Music
FARMER JASON
BECAUSE THERE IS A LITTLE FARMER IN ALL OF US
When internationally acclaimed singer-songwriter Jason Ringenberg created his family music character FARMER JASON in 2003, he had no idea he was launching what would prove to be the most commercially successful creation of his storied career. With JASON AND THE SCORCHERS, he pioneered the fusion of punk rock and country that turned the music world on its ear in the mid-1980s. Their first record, LOST AND FOUND, still shows up on critics’ “best of the 1980s” lists, and there is an exhibit of them in the COUNTRY MUSIC HALL OF FAME. When Jason went solo in 1999, the LONDON TIMES called him “one of the most dynamic live performers of his generation.” In 2008 the AMERICANA MUSIC ASSOCIATION awarded the band their LIFETIME ACHIEVEMENT AWARD. Jason could rest easily, assured that his place in rock ‘n’ roll history was secure.
However, with two sweet, beautiful, preschool daughters missing Daddy Jason during his 200 dates a year touring schedule, Jason wanted to make a cd that his kids could listen to while he was out globetrotting. Since they lived on a small farm near Bon Aqua, Tennessee, and Jason grew up on an Illinois hog farm, he reckoned that a roots oriented record about farming and farm animals was just the ticket. Hence the first Farmer Jason cd, A DAY AT THE FARM WITH FARMER JASON, was born. He released it “purely for fun” in the fall of 2003, delighted to hear his daughters singing along. That was the peak of his ambition for it.
To his surprise, soon lots of other daughters and little sons were singing along as well. Disney’s magazine FAMILY FUN called it “one of the Top 5 Family CDs of 2003.” Farmer Jason, Jason Ringenberg’s “twin brother” (wink wink), was soon doing concerts from inner city schools in Brooklyn to country fairs in rural Norway. In 2006 he released ROCKIN’ IN THE FOREST WITH FARMER JASON. With its stick in your head hooks and subtle lessons about ecology and nature appreciation, the record earned rave reviews, including the PARENTS CHOICE GOLD AWARD. Its success generated even heavier touring around the world, including many major European and US festivals. At the huge STAGECOACH festival USA TODAY called the Farmer Jason show “one of the most memorable of the festival.”
In Tennessee, Nashville Public Television took notice of this new sensation in their back yard, and produced an educational interstitial video series starring Farmer Jason based on songs from the two cds called IT’S A FARMER JASON! To everyone’s delight and surprise, the program won an EMMY AWARD for BEST CHILDREN’S PROGRAM MID SOUTH REGION in 2009. Using those videos and more new footage, Farmer Jason released the IT’S A…FARMER JASON! DVD in May of 2009. One reviewer for DADNABBIT called it “…instantly memorable fun… everything you would want in entertainment for your young ones.”
What started out as a simple side project to entertain his own daughters has grown into a worldwide band wagon pulled by a tractor and a singing farmer. You can bet the tractor will keep on rolling. Climb aboard and grab a pitchfork…or a guitar…
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